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The Macalope Daily: Motivations

The Macalope | Oct. 2, 2012
What motivates a company? Well, turns out it might be the same thing that motivates someone to write a diatribe about Apple.

Uh, no. Really, people don't care where their map data comes from, as long as it's good. The data Apple used wasn't as good, and people expect better from Apple. And some people sit around waiting for Apple's rare mistakes so they can make a big deal about it. That's what this is all about.

You pushed out a free, great thing...

Stop. Stop. Google Maps is not free. It certainly isn't free to Apple, and ads are a cost to users. Heffernan completely neglects to mention this anywhere in her extended hyperbolic rant, but one of the major reasons Apple couldn't come to terms with Google was because Google wanted more user data. Apple didn't want to give it to them because Apple's customers are people who buy iPhones. Google wanted it because Google's customers are advertisers. That's not crazy Apple fanboi talk, that's Business 101.

...and jammed in your amateur dimestore one, only because you were feeling afraid and grasping, and in so doing you showed a sicko side of yourself (one we all suspect has always been there).

You know Apple isn't actually an individual, right? And certainly not a serial killer or pervert or whatever it is you're implying? Because someone here's got issues and the Macalope's pretty sure it isn't the giant corporation that's being over-anthropomorphized.

It's exciting, sort of, when Titans clash. In the mythical Californian kingdoms of Cupertino and Mountain View, Apple and Google dramatically have at each other. They show no mercy. As arms resound...

Wait, is this whole column a viral ad for Game of Thrones? Because that would make more sense.

Actually, if you're looking for the real reason for Heffernan writing this ridiculously overbearing piece, look no further than the end of the author blurb:

Her new book, Magic and Loss: The Pleasures of the Internet, will be published in early 2013.

Oooh, there's still time for the Macalope to make the section about how mean fanbois can be to people who are very reasonably pointing out how evil Apple is!

Sorry, Virginia, you were saying something about companies making poor choices that reflect badly on themselves just to make money. Please continue.

We should maybe be grateful, then, for incidents like this latest dustup over Apple Maps. It lays that greed and pettiness bare.

Not bare enough, apparently, as we're 500 words in here and you haven't brought up even one of the very real business reasons on the part of both Apple and Google that led to this. There sure have been a lot of dramatic allusions to mythological warfare, though.

The company's aesthetic of purity and perfection--however fascist in nature--...


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